82. EL, Mannheim, 3-10-'11
The first result of our
meditation is that we get a feeling for the fact that we strive for and
make a connection with beings of the higher hierarchies, and that this
should express itself in such a way that we feel that we're entering
higher worlds, that we've arrived at the place where we originated;
that's the way we should experience it. This feeling of being
taken into the spiritual world should be warm and alive. One who
wants to enter this spiritual world must tell himself: Everything
must change in an esoteric — his concepts, feelings and knowledge
must change. Let's take men's egoism — it's
Luciferic beings who gave us memory. And while we're frugal in
physical life, we waste an awful lot of soul and spiritual forces. We
must become economical with these forces and transform them into
perception forces. To do this, we must practice self-knowledge. We
spray out our feelings and sentiments too selflessly from morn to
eve. Therefore we must first go through egotism in soul and spiritual
things. An esoteric is in danger of increasing his egoism here, and
so a moral and intellectual catharsis of a man must accompany all
true esoteric work.
We must realize that
something impossible is being demanded of us esoterics, and that
we're striving towards this impossible thing. For all striving
is a striving towards the impossible, and it's also impossible
to be unegoistical.
We must try to have the right
feeling about all developmental striving. A craving for knowledge and
progress is not the right thing. We should earnestly feel that
it's our duty to develop, for the divine spirit has placed
forced in us that he develops without help from us, but he has also
placed active forces in us that a man must develop through deeds.
It's the greatest sin against the divine spirit not to develop
these forces that the Godhead has placed in us for the benefit of
human evolution and progress These forces in us are so strong that
they lead us up into the spiritual world, although it may take a long
time. Therefore an esoteric should tell himself: “I'll
wait, because I know that the forces in me will sooner or later lead
me up into the spiritual world.” They do this if we're
devoted to the spiritual world in the right way.
The accessory exercises
develop the qualities in us that are necessary for the physical plane;
these are controlled thinking, actions one chooses oneself, equanimity,
etc. That way we'll gradually have a chamber in our heart, in
our soul, in which we keep our most sacred things, in which
we're esoterics, whereas as men we stand outside in the life.
And so conflict with ourselves can be taken for granted; we must
become fighters when we become esoterics.
Meditators complain that
thoughts storm in and disturb them, and to this one can reply that it's
beings fluttering around who storm in on us ever more strongly. Here
one can only say: Be glad that this is so; this is the result of
meditation and it shows you that thoughts are a spiritual power.
Courage, fearlessness and confidence are qualities that an esoteric
needs on his path.